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While I can't do much about numbers one and two on the previous entry, I /can/ do something about number three. So, I took advantage of the whole insomnia thing, and wrote an In Nomine fic. It's a not-quite-canon part of the origin story for a character I wrote up. Not canon mostly because I don't have many details for the part of the history I chose to write about. But anyway. Comments and criticism always welcome.
It began with whispers, as these things often do. Rumors and commentary, discussions and debates. Eventually the debates turned into quarrels, and the quarrels into cold silences that silenced the sweet words that normally flowed through lovers' lips. Amittai did not understand, and she could not divine Truth from silence. And so she laid herself and her burdens at the feet of her Bright Lord, looked up into his gentle eyes with her six, troubled ones, and asked, "Why?"
He smiled, and gathered her into his arms, stroking her scales in just the way that made her feel the most relaxed, and let her wrap herself around him. "Shhh," he whispered, "it will pass. The love of Angels is unbreakable. Watch them, show them the Truth in their Love, and eventually the quarrels will be forgotten. Love will remain, Amittai, my child. Watch Blandine and Beleth if you feel uncertainty; the love of Cherubim has no equal except the love of God." And he laughed, and drew her into his bower, and when she left, she was renewed.
As he bid, she passed among her friends and loved ones, urging them to stay True to one another, soothing the arguments where she could, encouraging avoidance where she could not. Sometimes it helped, but more often, the voices of dissent began to drown out the love songs, and Amittai felt something strange and frightful and new in the streets of the City.
When the world tore itself apart, she was winging her way to her Archangel's bower, again to seek his counsel. When the Symphony screamed as the Voice of God died at the hands of another Angel, she flew high, straining to see, to understand as Angel turned against Angel. But when she saw the Tower shatter, heard her Lord cry out in pain and betrayal, all she could do was scream with him, a sound echoed by every Lover in Heaven. And when all their Hearts shattered, there was nothing left to do but fall.
He came to Amittai there, battering herself into the ground as she wailed and thrashed. He knelt beside her head, and took it into his lap, letting her weep. From above, she could feel the moisture of his own tears trickling down her scales. As before, she wrapped herself around him, squeezing desperately. "Why, Lord, why?"
He looked her in the eyes, and she noted in a far off part of her mind that his eyes were no longer as blue as loyalty, but black, fathomless, and filled with a pain that she couldn't begin to understand. His voice was low and hoarse. "There is no Love, Amittai." His hands tightened on her, clutching, hurting. His expression was expectant.
"Th-there is no Love, Lord," she whispered, feeling the lie sink into her already-bleeding soul. It hurt, but what was one more pain amidst so many?
"He lied to us. God lied. There is no love, and nothing lasts, and God lied."
"He li-lied to us, Lord. God lied...nothing lasts, there is no Love, and God lied." Each lie was easier, falling from her lips until she could no longer feel the pain of them. And they soothed the other hurt, pushed it away, wrapped it up all neat and trim like the Truth used to. Perhaps...perhaps this /was/ the Truth, and all else was illusion. Love did not last, and God must have lied, because He said that Love was Truth, and if it wasn't, then maybe there was no Truth? Amittai flicked her wings as her soul settled back into order, and red feathers flew like a blizzard of bloodstained snow. "There is no Truth, Lord," she whispered, begging his approval with the final lie that she would recognize as such for a very long time.
"No," Andrealphus whispered back, and smiled a cold smile. "There is no Truth, there is no Love. There is only you, and only I." He stood, and surveyed a Heaven torn against itself. "Let us go, Ami, and show them. Let us show them all."
"Yes, my Lord."
It began with whispers, as these things often do. Rumors and commentary, discussions and debates. Eventually the debates turned into quarrels, and the quarrels into cold silences that silenced the sweet words that normally flowed through lovers' lips. Amittai did not understand, and she could not divine Truth from silence. And so she laid herself and her burdens at the feet of her Bright Lord, looked up into his gentle eyes with her six, troubled ones, and asked, "Why?"
He smiled, and gathered her into his arms, stroking her scales in just the way that made her feel the most relaxed, and let her wrap herself around him. "Shhh," he whispered, "it will pass. The love of Angels is unbreakable. Watch them, show them the Truth in their Love, and eventually the quarrels will be forgotten. Love will remain, Amittai, my child. Watch Blandine and Beleth if you feel uncertainty; the love of Cherubim has no equal except the love of God." And he laughed, and drew her into his bower, and when she left, she was renewed.
As he bid, she passed among her friends and loved ones, urging them to stay True to one another, soothing the arguments where she could, encouraging avoidance where she could not. Sometimes it helped, but more often, the voices of dissent began to drown out the love songs, and Amittai felt something strange and frightful and new in the streets of the City.
When the world tore itself apart, she was winging her way to her Archangel's bower, again to seek his counsel. When the Symphony screamed as the Voice of God died at the hands of another Angel, she flew high, straining to see, to understand as Angel turned against Angel. But when she saw the Tower shatter, heard her Lord cry out in pain and betrayal, all she could do was scream with him, a sound echoed by every Lover in Heaven. And when all their Hearts shattered, there was nothing left to do but fall.
He came to Amittai there, battering herself into the ground as she wailed and thrashed. He knelt beside her head, and took it into his lap, letting her weep. From above, she could feel the moisture of his own tears trickling down her scales. As before, she wrapped herself around him, squeezing desperately. "Why, Lord, why?"
He looked her in the eyes, and she noted in a far off part of her mind that his eyes were no longer as blue as loyalty, but black, fathomless, and filled with a pain that she couldn't begin to understand. His voice was low and hoarse. "There is no Love, Amittai." His hands tightened on her, clutching, hurting. His expression was expectant.
"Th-there is no Love, Lord," she whispered, feeling the lie sink into her already-bleeding soul. It hurt, but what was one more pain amidst so many?
"He lied to us. God lied. There is no love, and nothing lasts, and God lied."
"He li-lied to us, Lord. God lied...nothing lasts, there is no Love, and God lied." Each lie was easier, falling from her lips until she could no longer feel the pain of them. And they soothed the other hurt, pushed it away, wrapped it up all neat and trim like the Truth used to. Perhaps...perhaps this /was/ the Truth, and all else was illusion. Love did not last, and God must have lied, because He said that Love was Truth, and if it wasn't, then maybe there was no Truth? Amittai flicked her wings as her soul settled back into order, and red feathers flew like a blizzard of bloodstained snow. "There is no Truth, Lord," she whispered, begging his approval with the final lie that she would recognize as such for a very long time.
"No," Andrealphus whispered back, and smiled a cold smile. "There is no Truth, there is no Love. There is only you, and only I." He stood, and surveyed a Heaven torn against itself. "Let us go, Ami, and show them. Let us show them all."
"Yes, my Lord."
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That is the way it might have been.
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You're a sweetie, and thank you. :)
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Thanks, and yeah, poor Ami. Her eventual Redemption is almost as painful as the Falling, too. Poor little snake.
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Awwwwwww. [sniff] [nodnods] (At least she does eventually Redeem...)
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(Ironically, I've a character named Amittai too - Kobal's right hand man, the Duke of Hell and Demon of Irony. He's a red balseraph. Strange but true.)